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This first time most would like to have a spontaneous experience. But it's better to prepare a little bit until the first time. In order not to be afraid and not regret later. The first sex is extremely important for the psyche of a young person, especially a woman. It can even affect her entire sexual life later. So let's make sure that the memories of the first time are nice, no matter what happens later. If you are wondering if you are ready for your first sex, ask yourself a few questions.

The first time - how to prepare?Everything is important: the person, scenery, emotional climate and passion.First sexwe will definitely remember for life.Preparations for the first timeare not maneuvers before the attack, but you should think about a few things in advance.

How to prepare for the first time - And contraception

It may sound mundane and unromantic, but choosing and using some type of birth control method the first time protects you from the despairing question: oh god am i pregnant? If you decide to take the contraceptive pill - you need to act sooner: make an appointment with a doctor, do the appropriate tests, choose the pill and start taking it. When you decide to buy a condom, you must not only have it, but also be able to use it. Sexology knows cases of swallowing a condom and ensures that this non-standard use is highly ineffective. The condom should be put on the penis - it is best to train it on a not very ripe banana (peeled).

If a condom breaks or there are circumstances that make hormonal contraception ineffective (forget the pill, experience vomiting or diarrhea after taking it), will you go to the gynecologist and ask for a "pill after"?

You are not ready for the first time if:

  • hope you will get pregnant the first time or think you can't get pregnant the first time;
  • you think that your partner will think about condoms;
  • you count on infertile days or that your partner will "be careful";
  • you do not want to go to the gynecologist and prefer to take pills online or borrow from a friend;
  • you prefer to use spermicidal liquids or gels,because they are available without a prescription.
Worth knowing

Millennials lose their virginity much later than their parents

Millennials decide later than their parents for the first time. 1 in 8 people aged 26 years have never had sex .¹ Meanwhile, the parents of today's millennials mostly lost their virginity as teenagers - 69% of boys and 58% of girls had their first time behind them. Today it is 47% and 44% respectively.

Reason? Fear of intimacy. Millennials are afraid of establishing close relationships. Scientists blame pornography in part - women have perfect bodies in movies, and men have an eternal erection, which is discouraging, explains psychotherapist Susanna Abse.¹ Scientists even put forward the thesis that young people today are not interested in sex because they prefer to … watch Netflix.

Research conducted as part of the University College London research project covered over 16,000 people born in the years 1989-1990.

How to prepare for the first time - time and place

It is important not only with whom we do it for the first time, but also where. It is worth choosing a quiet place where we are not exposed to unexpected intrusion by third parties (brother or sister, parents, colleagues from the dormitory) and we have as much time for sex as we need. Locking up in the bathroom at a party is not a very good idea. There will come a time for such rush sex with a thrill once you have gained some experience. The first time you do it in calmer and more comfortable circumstances. Give yourself as much time as you need to get to know your bodies and their sensations.

How to prepare for the first time - don't you feel any pressure?

It would seem that the request for "proof of love" is a total, laughable relic, but there are guys who are a bit less open, but still let the girl understand that if it is impossible with her, they will look for happiness elsewhere. The decision to enter into intercourse must be sovereign on all sides - both you must not put pressure on your partner and he must not put pressure on you. You cannot decide to have sex for the first time because of the fear of losing your partner or "for the sake of peace." After all, the boy who puts pressure on you is immature and consider if he is worthy of your affection, not just the first time … If you decide to have sex with him and then he will leave anyway (sex won't stop him, don't be deceived ), you may have problems with self-esteem, even feel self-contempt.

It may also happen that the partner does not have bad will, but in an intimate situation he will bear it a bit and will strive for intercourse,assuming you want it too, when you're not ready for it yet. Don't give in for him. It must be your and only your decision. The resolute: "No!" When said firmly and loudly (not out of breath!) Should cool his enthusiasm.

Pressure from your partner is not the only one you may feel. You can also feel the pressure of the environment. For example, all your girlfriends have (or claim to have) their first time behind them, so you think you should, too, because you will pass for a cold woman, not to be liked by men, or for a freak. Or you see statistics showing that the average age of sexual initiation for Polish women is 19, and you are already 20, so you would like to speed up the course of events by deciding to have your first sex with someone by chance. It's really not worth it. The first sex under pressure can be a source of unpleasant memories for a lifetime. And there is no one "legal" age by which sexual initiation should be "checked" off.

How to prepare for the first time - behavior

There are so many websites, guides and other tips that you are probably theoretically very well prepared to caress and stimulate yourself. Now it's time to turn on openness to a partner. At the first time, many people tend to focus on their experiences. However, it is worth paying attention to your partner's reactions. The tutorials tell a lot, but they do not know every man and woman. It's better not to play the positions you are watching, but to follow your own body and listen to your partner's body voice.

Under the influence of alcohol or other intoxicants, a person thinks that he is ready for anything, especially for the first sex. Remember that alcohol and drugs are very bad advisers on many issues, not just this one. What's worse, they make you not only make a premature decision about sex, but it is also easier to forget about security and count on a stroke of luck. And that can have very unpleasant consequences. So get to your head: I don't go to bed when intoxicated!

  • Alcohol and sex - how does alcohol affect sex drive?
  • Boyfriend's first time: intercourse phases and first time
  • Does it hurt for the first time? What symptoms are normal and not after the first sex?
  • First time: the perfect place and the best position to start a sexual relationship
This will be useful to you

How to prepare for the first time - myths

For a woman, having sex for the first time is associated with defloration, i.e. breaking the hymen. It is worth knowing that:

  • defloration bleeding may or may not occur. No bleeding doesn't mean a girl isn't a virgin;
  • pain may also be insignificant or even imperceptible;
  • If you've decided to have sex for the first time, it doesn't mean that you have to complete your intention. Each of you can withdraw at any time, the only thing is to do it in a way that does not hurt your partner. In sex, it's better not to force yourself to anything.
  • If, in spite of the attempts, it is not possible to get the girl into high excitement and break through the hymen - it does not mean that she is cold, and he is a bad lover. Maybe they need more time, maybe it's not the moment, or maybe it's just that the hymen is so strong that a surgeon should cut it. Avoid blaming each other, labeling each other, criticizing each other. After all, it's the first time you're both doing it.

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