Asexuality is increasingly recognized as the fourth orientation on a par with hetero-, homo- and bisexuality. Asexual people do not have sex because they have no sex drive at all. How to recognize asexuality and can an asexual person build a normal relationship?

Asexuality - what does it mean?

Asexualityis a persistent lack of sexual attraction towards other people, entities or objects. People are born with asexuality - just as some are born with a homosexual or bisexual orientation. This means that a person who has so far led a successful sex life and suddenly, for unknown reasons, has lost interest in this sphere of life, should not suspect asexuality, but only a libido disorder.

Asexuality should not be confused with celibacy. A celibate person has an urge, but consciously holds back to sex. An asexual person does not have to hold back because he does not feel the need to have sexual intercourse with anyone at all.

Equating asexuality with impotence and libido disorders is an equally common mistake. There is a difference between a congenital lack of libido and its sudden disappearance for physiological or psychological reasons. A person who does not have sex because of a disease (e.g. hormonal disorders) or who is averse to sex because of some traumatic experience cannot be called asexual.

In such cases, libido disorders are not permanent and can usually be cured. In turn, asexual people do not require treatment at all, because for them the lack of sex is not a pathological condition.

Asexuality: the flag - what does it symbolize?

Asexualityis considered a fourth sexual orientation or non-sexual orientation. It is estimated that it affects about 1% of the population. The asexuals even have their logo - it's an inverted triangle, the top side of which reflects the Kinsey scale (it takes into account the 3 primary sexual orientations), and the vertex pointing downwards symbolizes a lack of orientation.

There is a thriving community of asexual people on the Internet called AVEN (The Asexual Visibility and Education Network), whose aim is to initiate a public discussion on asexuality and to popularize knowledge about it. Asexuals also want to be visible in the real world - for several years in the big onescities of Western Europe and the USA organize their demonstrations similar to parades of equality.

Important

What is not asexuality?

Asexuality is not:

  • celibacy,
  • sexual abstinence,
  • impotence,
  • sexual aversion,
  • antisexuality.

Can an asexual person fall in love?

Despite not feeling any sexual drive, an asexual person may fall in love and want to form a relationship with someone. Then her preferences depend on the so-called romantic orientation. It is a term for a romantic (platonic) attraction to people of a given gender. There are several main types of asexuality:

  • heteroromanticism - romantic attraction to people of the opposite sex,
  • homoromanticism - romantic attraction to people of the same sex,
  • biromanticism - romantic attraction to both sexes,
  • aromatic - lack of any, also romantic, attraction to other people.

More detailed classifications are also distinguished by transromanticism (attraction to people with undetermined gender identity), panromanticism (attraction to people of all sexes) or demiromanticism (romantic attraction to people with whom you have developed a very deep bond).

Contrary to appearances, an asexual can create a successful relationship with a person feeling sexual attraction. There are people who naturally have little needs in this area and then this arrangement is very beneficial for both sides. It is worth noting that being asexual does not mean giving up sex altogether. Very often, asexuals in relationships have relationships with their partners. However, they do it not out of their own need, but in order to satisfy the other person.

How to recognize asexuality?

Asexual people usually show no interest in sex from an early age. If someone has had a successful sex life so far and has suddenly lost attraction to other people, there is a high probability that they are not asexual. Such a change is most often due to he alth or mental disorders. Therefore, if we notice a sharp decrease in libido in ourselves or in our partner, we should first consult a doctor and perform the necessary tests.

The suspicion towards asexuality only makes sense if the person in any of their relationships did not show sexual needs and this tendency has been maintained since the beginning of their love life.

This will be useful to you

Many who initially consider themselves asexual gradually discover the joys and enjoyment of intercourse. The hypothesis behind this is that in young people with low libidosexuality is simply unawakened. They need the security of being in a stable relationship. Then they can experiment and get to know each other's bodies.

What should you know about the new, "fourth" orientation and how to distinguish sexual drive disorders from the lack of it?

Hear what asexuality is all about. This is material from the LISTENING GOOD cycle. Podcasts with tips.

Category:

Psychology