- What did I think? That it will end soon, I will die and that's it. In an instant, my whole world collapsed. It was Friday the thirteenth. March 13, 2015 to be exact. Have I had bad memories of this day since then? No, I am not superstitious - says Karolina Ceglarska. For five years he has been suffering from a cancer of soft tissues and bones with metastases. Her story is, as she herself says, "suffering interwoven with moments of great happiness."

It's Sunday. Karolina has been undergoing chemotherapy in Warsaw since Friday. This is another cycle. He lives in Bieniowice near Legnica. In the Warsaw Department of Oncology and Oncological Surgery for Children and Adolescents, her mother usually accompanies her. This time, her boyfriend, Tomek, was with her for the first two days.

- I had to show him everything - my oncological world. Tell me how to put my things in the cupboard, where to hide the bag. I was curious about his reaction - Karolina mechanically touches the ring on her finger.

- It's an engagement from Tom. Why navy blue? This is my favorite color. I associate it with the ocean and peace - Karolina shows me the ring with a smile.

Lumps under the armpits

It started in 2014. Karolina was then in her first year of studies at the Wrocław University of Technology.

- I studied construction. I lived in Wrocław with my friends. I remember standing in the bathroom one day and suddenly feeling a lump under my left armpit and one on my hip. My left leg was also a bit pained. I thought I strained my muscles in training. I exercised intensively, so I played down the pain. I was convinced that, as usual, it would pass by itself - he says.

The lumps, however, did not disappear, and the leg hurt more and more. Karolina finally decided to tell her mother about her ailments.

- She got scared and told me to go to the doctor immediately. I had neither the desire nor the time. After all, I was he althy, young and very busy. I studied, played sports, traveled, and met with friends - she recalls.

The pain in her knee bothered her, especially at night, because it was the strongest then. Then she decided to go to an orthopedist.

- It turned out that there is nothing there. I was given spreadable ointments and a collagen preparation to drink. Neither one nor the other helped. The pain persisted, she says. Afteranother lump appeared in the month of the month, this time under the right armpit.

One of the doctors who visited Karolina ordered a biopsy of the subcutaneous lumps under her armpits and on her hip, as well as a chest X-ray:

- I was angry that I had to go for another examination. I had my first session in college and a lot of study. Research took precious time from me. However, I did it, as I thought then, for my mother.

The samples were collected and Karolina went to Rome with her friends during the semester break:

- My parents were the first to know that it could be cancer. They didn't tell me about it. They didn't want to spoil my trip. After returning from Rome, the doctors ordered me additional tests, including CT scan of the chest, hip and leg.

Karolina was diagnosed with stage IV osteosarcoma with metastases. - There were a lot of them - for the kidneys, pancreas, lungs, lymph nodes and subcutaneous tissues - he enumerates.

Growth jump and genetics

Osteosarcoma (Latin osteosarcoma) is most often diagnosed in young people, especially in the period of intensive growth. Statistics show that about 80 people suffer from it annually in Poland. It is estimated that as much as 80-90 percent. osteosarcoma develops in long bones.

What are the causes of this disease? There is no unequivocal answer to this question, although there are several hypotheses. It certainly appears in the period of the so-called a growth jump, i.e. a rapid increase in bone length. The peak incidence is the second decade of human life, and osteosarcomas develop in the vicinity of growth cartilages.

Another factor is ionizing radiation: bones subjected to radiation are exposed to a higher risk of neoplastic processes. It grows with the dose of absorbed radiation.

A genetic predisposition also plays a role in the formation of osteosarcomas. There are several genes whose mutations may increase the risk of developing this cancer.

What symptoms may indicate an osteosarcoma? These are bone pains located in a specific place, often appearing at night and waking up from sleep, swelling of the soft tissues adjacent to the diseased area. In the case of an advanced tumor, it is possible that the tumor is visible to the naked eye. Unlike other cancers, osteosarcomas do not produce symptoms such as anemia, low-grade fever, weight loss or weakness.

These types of neoplasms are usually treated with aggressive and multi-directional methods - surgical removal of the tumors and additional pharmacological treatment(chemotherapy). Early diagnosis increases the chances of successful therapy. It is estimated that at the time of diagnosis as much as 15 percent. of patients already have visible metastases in imaging tests.

"My whole world collapsed"

- What did I think? That it will end soon, I will die and that's it. In an instant, my whole world collapsed. It was Friday the thirteenth. March 13, 2015 to be exact. Have I had bad memories of this day since then? No, I'm not superstitious. In retrospect, I may even remember him well - says Karolina.

That day she had an appointment with a friend to the cinema. - I went, but I didn't tell him about the disease. I didn't think I was sick. It was so new, fresh. I wanted it to be normal for a while - she recalls.

The only person she said was her friend was her friend.

- That weekend I wanted to be alone with my illness. I didn't need a pat on the head and consolation. Today I know very well that disease does not go well alone - he admits.

She had a diagnosis on Friday and a visit to the Oncology Center in Ursynów, Warsaw, on Monday. Doctors prescribed her chemotherapy and suggested that she take it in Wrocław, closer to her place of residence. She received her first chemotherapy treatments at the Lower Silesian Cancer Center, followed by the Department of Bone Marrow Transplantation, Oncology and Pediatric Hematology. Then she was treated in Warsaw at the Institute of Mother and Child on Kasprzaka Street.

- My life is suffering interspersed with moments of great happiness - says Karolina.

One of them was Bartek. He appeared in Karolina's life right at the beginning of her battle with cancer.

- He had the same disease as me and lived near me, because in Legnica - he says.

"He was a romantic. He wrote poems for me"

When they met, Bartek was five years after treatment. They met through a mutual acquaintance.

- She suggested that we meet, talk and exchange experiences about being ill. I didn't want to, I really didn't want to. My mother convinced me to overcome my reluctance and meet Bartek. “Try what's harmful to you. You're not losing anything, ”she kept telling me. Bartek came with his mother to the meeting. At that time, I was negative about the whole world - says Karolina.

She mentions that the questions were mainly asked by her parents. She felt discomfort, she was terrified.

- Bartek told me that then he saw fear in my eyes. I was withdrawn. It was my mother who exchanged phone numbers with him. He wrote to her, advised on treatment. Then we startedtalk, meet. And so, from word to word, we became a couple - along with these words, a smile appears on Karolina's face.

She admits that it was thanks to Bartek that she survived the worst period in her life. She avoided loneliness, which at the beginning of her illness was very troubling her. - When you have someone next to you, you don't constantly think about being sick. This is important. I was glad that Bartek was with me.

- What did Bartek take on you? - I'm asking.

- He was a romantic. He wrote poems for me. He took me on trips to the End of the World. It is such a small town in Greater Poland. A very symbolic name, right? Bartek was very staring at me. He himself has gone through a lot in his life. He had a few surgeries behind him, a lot of chemistry, an endoprosthesis in his leg. He knew the diagnosis, so he knew our story could end soon. However, he got deeply involved. He was so in love with me. Over time, I also fell in love with him - confesses Karolina.

Their love was interrupted by Bartek's relapse. The boy died in June 2016.

- I experienced it a lot. It was scary. A very close person to me has passed away. He died of the same disease that I had. I guess then I was waiting for my death. I was not angry with Bartek for leaving me. I was furious with the disease that it took it from me. “Various thoughts were appearing in my head. I guess I expected to die too soon.

From the moment Bartek was diagnosed with recurrence, they were together all the time.

- We were lying in one ward, in rooms facing each other. The doctors didn't want me to see Barek weaken. When I had an operation to insert a prosthesis in my left leg, he was taking another chemotherapy - says Karolina.

Together they ran a Facebook page "In spite of Storms, Karolina and Bartek are fighting for the sun", where they shared their stories related to cancer treatment.

"I was with him when he left"

When they returned home in March 2016, Bartek was under the care of a home hospice. Doctors decided on palliative treatment. - I couldn't sit still at home. After the operation, I shouldn't walk, I was supposed to have a few months of rehabilitation. I decided to act. My right leg was functional, so I could drive a car with an automatic transmission. I took a cot from my aunt and went to Bartek's house. His dad opened it for me. I asked him to help me bring this bed because I'm staying. I lived with him for a few months, and in the meantime I went to Warsaw for chemistry. I was with him practically all the time when I returned. Also when he left. Together with his and my mother … - Karolina pauses for a moment.

The vacation that was just beginning was for hersometimes mourning. She missed Bartek, thought about what would happen if their lives had turned out differently.

- I had to endure it, digest it. It was very difficult for me. I have decided to go back to school in October. I wanted to change my surroundings, meet new people, leave the house. To break away from this disease, make something happen in my life - he says.

She quit her studies in Wrocław. She chose finance and accounting in Legnica. In June 2022, she defended her bachelor's degree. The topic of her work was accounting and financing of a foundation helping the sick. Now she is writing her MA.

Karolina also uses the help of the foundation and online fundraising. - At first I didn't want to show off my disease, I couldn't admit it to strangers. But then there was no way out - he explains.

Second smile of fate

Karolina's chemotherapy inhibits the growth of tumors. He also needs targeted drugs. - My disease is so advanced that it is inoperable. You can't cut all these tumors out because there are too many of them. Inserting an endoprosthesis improved my quality of life - she explains.

Among those non-reimbursed drugs that helped Karolina, there was, among others, Nexavar. One package, which is enough for a monthly treatment, costs about 15 thousand. zlotys. Herceptin was the next targeted drug.

- These drugs give me a few or even several months of stabilization. Thanks to one of them, I had peace for a year and a half. Now I'm in the next stage of therapy - it's Tyverb, which the doctors suggested after doing expensive gene tests. It costs seven thousand a month - he explains. And he adds that if it were not for the collections organized, among others by her friends and teachers, as well as the generosity of people she did not know, her treatment would be simply impossible.

In 2022, Karolina had a second prosthesis inserted, this time in her right leg, as a result of an injury in a car accident. Thanks to hard rehabilitation, she regained her fitness, even with two prostheses in both legs.

For the second time, fate smiled at Karolina in 2022, when she met Tomek, who has been her fiance for several months. Tomek is eight years older than her.

- It was a very funny story. I've had five weddings in my family. I didn't want to go alone. I decided to invite a stranger. I wrote an advertisement on an internet portal that I was looking for company for such an event. There were a few volunteers, not all of them delighted me, to put it mildly. Tomek charmed me with his sense of humor and way of being. It turned out he was a cool guy. We had a great time together, thenwe started to meet and leave together. Although it seemed to me that I would never fall in love after Bartek's death, love found me - says Karolina.

"I wish I had more strength"

Tomek proposed to her last Christmas.

- He did it in his signature style. We talked on the phone and he told me that we would only see each other on the second day of Christmas because he wants to spend some time with his parents. Then he called a second time and said that he would arrive the day before, in the evening. When he appeared he was holding a bouquet of flowers in one hand and two bottles of moonshine in the other. He gave flowers to my mother, moonshine to my father, and in front of me - still in his coat - he knelt, took out the ring and asked if I wanted to become his wife. At first I was shocked, I thought he was crazy, but I didn't run away and of course I agreed - laughs Karolina.

They want to get married as soon as possible. Perhaps this holiday.

Karolina already has an idea for a dress. - It will be white, of course. I don't know what to wear because I don't like wigs and my hair fell out after chemotherapy. I feel great wearing hats, but they do not match a wedding dress. I'll figure something out. Maybe my hair will grow back by the holidays? - wonders. She adds that Tomek likes her without a wig. - He doesn't think it's by force. If I'm getting tired of it, I shouldn't wear it. He repeats that he loves me as I am, she says.

Karolina admits that she is as happy as possible. She gets tired of the consecutive cycles of chemistry.

- I wish I had more strength and not feel as bad as I sometimes do. I feel stupid because I cannot keep up with the course of life. Tomek has so much strength, and although I really want to, sometimes I can't keep up with him - when he says this, tears appear in her eyes.

- Or maybe it was supposed to be like that? He is a big strong man and I am small and fragile. We complement each other - he says.

"We're making a life for ourselves"

Karolina's passion is traveling. - Whenever I can, I'm going somewhere. Despite my illness, I managed to visit several places. Recently, I was in Milan, visiting Georgia with my friend. We went with Tomek, among others to Barcelona and Portugal. We also visited Sweden and Denmark, we returned to Poland by ferry. I like countries that are not hot. I hate high temperatures since taking chemicals. I also do not like sunbathing. I prefer to absorb what surrounds me. Visit, people watch. It's great to sit in a cafe, have a cup of coffee or tea and chat, 'he says. Now he dreams of traveling to the United States. ''

Recently, Karolinadiscovered a new passion, interior design. It so happened that when she met Tomek, he moved to a new apartment. - I helped him arrange them, so I had a job. I'll stay with him for a while. We are slowly making up our lives - he says.

He does not hide that he is a believer. - I believe in god. That he has a plan for me. I don't understand why my children get sick, why I get sick, but He certainly knows. When you hear cancer, it feels like the end of the world. I treat these five years of struggle as the beginning. Each day is now worth its weight in gold for me, everyone I want to remember, enjoy it and those I have around me - she says.

When asked what she would encourage other sick people to do, she immediately replies that they should be courageous. - Do not be afraid to make your dreams come true, do not postpone plans for later, and above all let us love ourselves and others - he says.

Category:

Other