Help the development of the site, sharing the article with friends!

You are constantly looking for something - in a pile of papers on your desk, in your purse. You have a lot of unfinished business. Sometimes you feel that you are out of control of your own life. How to deal with it?

You probably prefer the term "artistic disorder" to what surrounds you. But it's better to call a spade a spade. It's amessthat bothers you with your everyday life. If you are yet again late for work because you couldn't find pantyhose, it's time to control the chaos before it takes over you.

Living in disorder is not only the speci alty of the lazy. Keeping order is a skill - you have to learn it and like it.

Causes of the mess

It turns out that every fourth adult is not good at keeping order. It is worth realizing where the cause of the trouble lies:

  • Life full of tension.The constant lack of time, fear for family and he alth make even trivial matters difficult to control. Perfectionists often become messy. Trying to tackle too many tasks at once - and it's best as possible - ends up in chaos.
  • Exaggerated sentimentality.We all like memories and mementos, but some of them especially strongly. This mainly applies to women: in this T-shirt, Staś went to kindergarten for the first time, this cup is from a friend you have not seen in 10 years. Regret throw away and things arrives. The belief that "everything can be useful." It is not known when and to whom, but just in case, we stuff the old kettle into the corner of the kitchen cupboard, because … maybe someone will need a plot.
  • Being Zosia Samosiaand getting your loved ones accustomed to the fact that you will do everything best and quickly on your own. Young children do not really understand the word "clean up", teenagers do not see the mess, and the husband cleaning up will make an even bigger mess. If you've been taking care of everyone so far, your homework may have overwhelmed you.
  • Reluctance to clean up.Maybe you grew up in a pedantic family. Parents decided what you would put where, they checked whether things in the cabinets were arranged according to their idea. Or you were relieved of your cleaning duties. Now, as an adult, you are trying to organize the space around you yourself, not always with success. Or maybe by perversely doing what you were not allowed to do in the past - you make a mess.
  • The tendency to collect in childhood.You may be collecting because your parents did it. They brought home everything they could buy, because the shop shelves were empty. Gathering is also a syndrome of memories of one's own poverty or the willingness to pass on one's belongings to offspring and grandchildren.
  • Living in a relationship with a dominant partner.If he is "always right", he often implies that you owe him a lot, a common space that you arranged for "his" money and according to his wishes, may be a stranger to you. You are reluctant to change and embellish it.
  • No reconciliation with passing.Keeping the souvenirs of the common day - a ticket to the Sopot pier, broken Zorka camera, old dresses, we hope to save a part of the past.
Worth knowing

Syllogomania, or gathering

There are people who over the years accumulate a lot of items in their home and are unable to part with anything without regret. When a house turns into a lair, its owner may suffer from a disease called pathological hoarding. Until now, it has been claimed that it affects mainly retirees and is a way of coping with problems: the feeling of loneliness or the fear of a changing reality. However, the picking habit is increasingly affecting young people. Doctors consider syllogomania a mental illness.

Preventing clutter

Regardless of the cause, disorder gets in the way of life. Try to avoid him. Organize the space around you. In stores you will find boxes and containers that will contain the things you really need. Be sure to describe them to find everything quickly. Each new thing is a new tenant. You need to plan a place for her in the bedroom, wardrobe or purse.

Do you want to buy a new bread container, because the old one is ugly and does not close properly? Think what you will do with its predecessor. Learn to donate and make gifts. Instead of thinking, "It will be useful to me again sometime," you better think about whether you can make someone happy about it. Maybe the blouse you "grew" from 5 years ago will be delighted with your friend?

Like cleaning

Share your responsibilities. While many things you will do better, make a list of things the children and your husband can handle. If each of them does something that only takes a few minutes, you will gain up to an hour to focus on the important things. Use the rule of small steps. If you need more cleaning, divide the task into several smaller ones: wardrobe, window sills, fridge.

Enter the word "inventory" in your dictionary. Put it in the center once a monthroom, a box or a large bag with the decision that you will fill it. You will surely find so many unnecessary things and rubbish. Designate a place for your little mess in your room or company desk. Keep the rest in perfect order. After some time, you will probably realize that you want to introduce order there as well.

Make cleaning fun. Listen to the music, look at the TV.

Exaggeration is bad

Extremes are not good in any area of ​​life. If you notice that cleaning has become your obsession, you are disturbed by a crookedly hung cloth and every lint on the carpet, and you neglect your family, give up pleasure and rest, it is a signal that it is not the best. Try to think and talk to your loved ones about what makes you sad or irritates. Perhaps you run away from problems cleaning up. Order is to make life easier, not complicate it.

This will be useful to you

7 reasons to fight disorder

What surrounds you strongly influences your mood and well-being. What are the effects of disorder in the immediate environment?

1) It engages and overstrains the senses, especially the eyesight. It makes the brain work harder, trying to separate what is important from what is unimportant. As a result, you tire faster, and the tasks to be performed seem more difficult and take more time.

2) It distracts you from important things, not related to cleaning. If you plan each day with a calendar in your hand, and yet you are still late with something, postpone something or do something sloppy, it is not necessarily the excess of activities. Perhaps you take a long time to look for something, such as keys, the necessary certificate, etc. Remember how many times you had to pour everything out of your purse to find the car keys. How many precious minutes did it take and how many nerves it cost.

3) Makes it harder to relax, both physically and mentally. You fall asleep feeling that you have something to do. Even a weekend spent on a plot of land does not relax you, because you live with the prospect of returning home and facing the disorder.

6) Cause shame and guilt. At the sound of the doorbell, you close all rooms in a panic to hide the disorder. How many times have you said, "Sorry about this mess, but …"? You miss meetings with friends, and at the same time you are afraid that one of them might come over without warning. You rarely invite guests because you know you'll be scrubbing tiles and stuffing things in cupboards instead of just baking a cake.

7) Breaks down relationships with loved ones. Research shows that in relationships between partners, the most common cause of argument is the issue of clutter. This is true for both layoutspartnerships and parent-child relationships.

monthly "Zdrowie"

Help the development of the site, sharing the article with friends!

Category:

Psychology