Empathetic man - what does it mean to be empathetic? Empathy is needed in life, but if you prefer to withdraw rather than fight for yours, or if you find it hard to speak openly about what you want and want, you have crossed the line. If the answer is yes, don't be surprised that as an empathetic person you have a harder time than others.

An empathetic personshows a very desirable attitude, as long as it does not exceed certain limits. What are the good and bad sides of empathy, and how can an empathetic person find balance?

Being an empathetic person: what does it mean?

We have been told since childhood that there are never too many polite forms. So many thanks, please, and we apologize. But while those first words can never be enough, such a constant beating of your chest and repeating mea culpa (Latin for my fault) can lead to low self-esteem and social intimidation. Statistics show that every fourth adult, even if the situation does not require it, begins the sentence with "I'm sorry". And so we have: "I'm sorry to ask", "I'm sorry to ask", "I'm sorry to be alive" which can finally lead to the bizarre "sorry I dare to apologize at all".

So let's get right at the beginning: empathy is good. Apologizing to your own shadow is wrong and unfavorable, but empathy in and of its purest form is absolutely not. It is true that people who are empathetic and have too much "compassion" have a harder time in this world, but the point is not to go through life constantly pushing your elbows out. Understanding the other person, their needs and feelings is useful not only in your professional life, but also in everyday life, at home. Among family and friends. In nature and in the urban jungle. Because:

  • An empathetic personwill not go for a walk to the zoo or a circus show, and having a choice of a demonstration to defend human rights or a free trip to a Spanish corrida, for sure will choose the former. The good of all creatures is the most important for him.
  • An empathetic manwill not inform his boss that his friend is earning extra money on the side, even if the denunciation meant a faster promotion and a significant raise.
  • An empathetic personcannot intentionally hurt another person, and if he or she causes pain, then unconsciously.

This is good and useful empathy.Giving support and a sense of security. Surrounding with the warmth and optimism of a loved one.

Important

Good touch

According to Michael Banissy of University College London, empathic compassion can be compared to the real touch of another person. And this is what makes the empathetic people feel perfectly in the well-being of even those completely strangers.

It's too much, it's unhe althy

Unfortunately, just like the proverbial stick, also being an empathetic person has two ends. The line between the warm and upbuilding and the exhausting and destructive one is extremely thin. Overly empathetic people not only apologize for their existence, but also "infect" themselves with all the suffering of the world. They absorb problems both from their immediate surroundings and those that happen hundreds of kilometers from their place of stay. Their domestic quarrels between their neighbors and war conflicts in far-away Sudan can bring them to the brink of despair and burnout. Accumulating the suffering of others burns you mentally and burns you physically. Over time, it can even lead to aggression and social isolation. Empathetic, generally not easy. On the one hand, the willingness to help and serve others gives him the opportunity to be fulfilled and happy, on the other - more and more often it can cause quite considerable problems. On the other hand, psychologists repeat like a mantra that: everything we do for the other person, no matter if it is a good deed or a bad deed, sooner or later will come full circle and come back to us with redoubled strength. On the next day or in a few years.

A truly empathetic man for show

In the case of sincere empathy, whether our compassion and a good deed bring us any benefit should not matter. If there is any self-interest, we are dealing either with a lie or with the so-called empathy for show, serving only the willingness to profit and build one's own image. Apart from the willingness to help, an empathetic person usually has some special character traits. Willing to help is not enough. It is also important whether he has a positive attitude to life, he can enjoy small things and treat each coming day as the most pleasant gift. He must not be a pessimist, attracting to troubled people just to make himself feel better.

Some less, some more

What makes some people more empathetic than others? According to some studies, upbringing is the most important, but also genes. If your parents grew up feeling that you should first and foremost adapt to others, and any attempts to put your own way with the risk of social rejection, it is hardly surprising thatthe children are afraid of their own shadow later, they are full of complexes and lack self-confidence.

Worth knowing

Yawning like compassion

- The empathetic are more likely to "contract" yawning than the less socially sensitive, believes British researcher Atsushi Senjiu. According to him, we are prompted by the same mechanism that drives empathy to yawn at the sight of other yawns.

Category:

Psychology