The baby has trouble sleeping, is it naughty? Maybe he is afraid! His fear never comes without a reason. The child gives us signals by presenting the behaviors underlying fear. They should not be underestimated.

The fact thatchildrenare afraid seems obvious to us. They are afraid of the wolf, the witch, the grandfather who will take no one knows where, the scarecrows hiding in the corner of the room. Classic 19th-century children's literature was based onanxiety . It was supposed to lecture and scare people, because fear is an excellent tool for adults to manipulate a child. We continue to do it more or less consciously, e.g. we scare them with giving them over to strangers.

Children's fears: insecurity

Every day a baby is involved in a multitude of activities that make up his mind as a caring parent. The child feels safe in the arms of mom and dad. If the parents' behavior confirms the baby's expectations, fear will not arise. If, in the same situation, the parent reacts differently, approaches one another, and not another time, the toddler receives information that he cannot count on help. A tension builds up over insecurity, which creates anxiety.

Of course, you have to distinguish between crying, which is blackmail, but you also have to react to such crying. Be interested, which does not mean fulfilling a request! You can't pretend that you can't hear your baby. The child must be informed that it is important to the mother, that she will always come and check if there is any harm to him.

Important

Anxiety never occurs without a reason. And you can't fight him until we find out where he came from. The behaviors of a few-year-olds often aim to reduce the anxiety that appeared at a very early stage of development.

Underlying the fear of the dark is a traumatic experience from early childhood. In addition, the child has a vivid imagination. If he listens to scary stories, watches a horror movie on TV, it's no wonder that he is afraid later. So it's better to avoid such situations. And when the fear appears, we should always leave the dim light on in a dark hall or next to a child's bed, even for the whole night.

Children's fears: fear of losing a parent

Moms, even the best ones, sometimes disappear without saying a word. They sneak out of the house ste althily so as not to worrychild. But is it right? What happens to the baby when mom disappears? In this way, we create the fear of losing a parent. It is better for the child to survive the breakup than to be cheated.

It must be clear: "Now I'm going out, I'm leaving you, but I'll be back." And if we give you the time of your return, you should keep your word. A child must not be deceived. Do you know what your child is really afraid of? Rejection, loss of your love, your anger, non-acceptance. There is no greater pen alty for him than not kissing him goodnight. The fear of disapproval may also arise when a parent's behavior varies in similar situations. A few-year-old once praised for drawing, another time criticized, loses his self-confidence, feels not only incapable, but also unloved.

Important

Disturbing Signals

  • Sleep disorders - trouble falling asleep, insomnia.
  • Nightmares - a child experiences in a dream what he or she failed while awake, what he fears.
  • Bedwetting - can be somatic or psychological. It can be associated with anxiety.
  • Refusal to eat - there are no "fussy eaters" for no reason.
  • Change of behavior - the child is rude, irritable, sometimes arrogant.
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Children's fears: fear of the unknown

Why is one child happy to go to school, curious about the world, while others, clinging to their mother's skirt, would most likely not leave the house? A child who always receives the necessary help develops not only a sense of security, but also self-confidence. When she later goes to kindergarten, she is happy. However, if the parent does not react as expected, the child will be insecure and withdrawing.

It also matters how disciplined and independent our child is. If at home, mum does the simplest things for her - she won't be able to do it either in kindergarten or at school. The outside world will be perceived as hostile and threatening.

You must do it

Methods of treating childhood anxiety

If you notice any of the behaviors described above, go with your child to a child psychologist. He will help find the cause of the anxiety and develop methods of treatment. At home, set up constant rules for expectations and evaluations. It is important that everyone involved in the upbringing requires the same from the child.

Develop rituals, the observance of which will strengthen his sense of security (eg sitting at the table together, cleaning up after yourself, etc.). You need to show your child acceptance, kindness and support him whenever he doesneeds.

Behaviors underlying childhood anxiety

The baby gives us signals. It presents the behaviors underlying anxiety and which are aimed at reducing it. Usually parents disregard them. Meanwhile, the child begins to capture these behaviors that work. Because if his tummy hurts, his mother is sitting by his bed, taking care of them. If he refuses to eat, the whole family runs after him with the plate, and mum lights up when she finally graciously finishes her dinner.

Refusal to eat, frequent colds or colic - these may be unconscious attempts to get your attention. This is how the child signals: "I feel bad". Even your anger can be a reward because the little one can see that you are interested in him. That is why fearful children are often rude. Do not disregard these signals, even if they seem unimportant to you!

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