I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend for two years. Supposedly briefly, perhaps for a long time, but we have experienced a few tragedies, as well as ideal moments. We talk openly about marriage, children, etc. But there is a problem: the ring, if it wasn't, is not there. I would like to finally be introduced as his fiancée, not his girlfriend. Especially since the words that came out of his mouth recently that maybe we could try for a child. I would like to get this ring at last, but what signals should I give him to kneel and ask? Of course, I don't mean a wedding, but a kind of stability and certainty. What should I do in order not to tell him directly, so that he would not think that I am imposing myself and pressing.

Sending signals can be quite a risky solution when it comes to building a sustainable future together. The fears related to the sense of imposition are understandable, but if you want to create a relationship based on mutual understanding, it is worth focusing on open messages at this stage. The situation you describe is the perfect moment to try to talk about your needs, what stabilization means for you, and check what your partner understands by this slogan. Perhaps it will turn out that for him such a sign of commitment is a declaration about the child, and not a ritual of proposal. Leaving such an important matter in the area of ​​guesswork and signals can be a source of much misunderstanding and frustration, so I encourage you to talk to us.

Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.

Patrycja Szeląg-JaroszPsychologist, coach, personal development trainer. She gained professional experience working in the field of psychological support, crisis intervention, professional activation and coaching.

He specializes in the area of ​​life coaching, supporting the client in improving the quality of life, strengthening self-esteem and active self-esteem, maintaining life balance and effectively dealing with the challenges of everyday life. She has been associated with non-governmental organizations in Warsaw since 2007, co-runs the Center for Personal Development and Psychological Services of the Compass

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