My child is attending a special school, he is 13 years old, he has a slight disability. She is a very mobile child. I have very big problems with that. He has no opinion, often imitates his colleagues, listens to them. He talks very ugly, not paying attention to whether he is an adult or his peer. At school, I enrolled him in a psychiatrist. But it does have a temporary effect. How to proceed?
From what you wrote, I understood that the Lady's son has a problem with excessive mobility, uses curses against adults and peers, and is heavily influenced by his peers.
All the behaviors you mention occur more intensively in boys during adolescence, and the peer group then becomes very important, and even the most important in social relationships. Previously proven parental interventions also cease to be effective during this period. The child becomes a teenager and often does not understand his / her behavior and it is difficult for him / her to deal with the emotions he experiences, he / she cannot constructively deal with excessive mental tension.
It is important to be patient, calm and firm about your expectations and set boundaries. That adults, both at home and at school, pay attention when he is vulgar and does not respect the boundaries of others, that they speak, show how they can express themselves differently, and give an alternative to, for example, profanity. It's important to say why we don't want something and how we feel when she does something. It is important to arouse empathy and show the moment when his behavior is not acceptable to us.
I do not know what the psychiatrist's recommendations were, whether my son was given drugs - whether his excessive mobility requires pharmacological intervention or not. I would recommend a few meetings with a psychologist to help you find the right way to communicate with your son, show how the teenager's behavior changes, how to set limits, how to teach constructive forms of relieving mental tension. Perhaps in the area there is a chance to join a group of parents who meet to improve their parenting skills, it is also worth looking for a social skills training for your son. Maybe you can engage a psychologist or school educator,to help you find such a group for your son.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Dominika Ambroziewicz-WnukPsychologist, personal development trainer.
For 20 years she has been working with teenagers, young adults and their carers. Supports people who experience school and relational difficulties, adolescence disorders and teenage parents www.centrum-busola.pl
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