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We are with my husband 10 years after getting married. I am 35 and my husband is 40. We have two children who we love. My problem is: I can't help myself, I don't know how to take it - my husband is secretly watching porn websites. Even though she assures me that she loves me very much, I feel humiliated, betrayed and sorry. We make love once or twice a week. Often, during intercourse, I do something against myself to please my husband. Then I feel ashamed, sometimes I cry in secret. I once said that I know about these pages that it works badly for me because when it "winds up" after watching them, I am not ready. I noticed that despite my best efforts, my husband prefers these "porn stars". How to take it?
Your husband's viewing of pornography is a threat to your relationship. First, because the husband is likely to be masturbating while watching porn (if he isn't already doing it, he is sure to start) and defusing his sex drive with porn rather than in contact with the Lady. this can lead to him choosing pornography instead of intercourse with you because it is a quick and easy way to relieve sexual tension and he will become addicted to pornography. Forcing yourself to behave that you do not accept should not take place. Spouses should respect each other's needs and there should be no need for anyone to be coerced into sexual behavior that they do not approve of. You should not engage in behaviors that make you feel bad. your husband should respect that you do not accept them. Continuing to force yourself may stop you from enjoying sex and make you feel more and more negative emotions towards your husband. You should talk honestly with your husband and make it clear that you do not accept this type of behavior and that it is a threat to your relationship.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Magdalena Krzak (Bogdaniuk)
Psychologist, psychotherapist, clinical sexologist and forensic sexologist. He has a Clinical Sexologist Certificate, awarded by the Polish Society of Sexology, after completing full specialization in clinical sexology in Warsaw, and a Court Sexologist Certificate. He deals with treatmentsexual dysfunction in women and men. He works both individually and with couples. She conducts psychotherapy for victims of sexual violence. He conducts diagnostics and psychological support for transsexual people.
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