How to recover from a marital infidelity? I can't cope with it, although it's been 1.5 years since I found out that my husband had cheated on me. I can't recover …
I don't know what that means to you - "pick up". Human responses are so varied and so different from one situation to another that it is very difficult to standardize them. Does that mean you can't forgive? Does that mean you don't want to forgive? Does that mean you keep thinking about it? Does this mean that you cannot live with him under the same roof because you are constantly reminded of bad times? Does that mean you're still mad at him? Or are you crying all the time and unable to do your daily activities? Do you wonder what you are at fault? Or maybe you've divorced him and now feel very lonely after all? What exactly is wrong with you about this betrayal? Reactions to betrayal largely depend on what the relationship was before, why the betrayal happened, what was the reaction of the person who committed the betrayal. There are many factors that can play a role here. However, the most important thing is our personality, our self-esteem and the ability to change we show. And also how much we loved a person and how much we want to continue to be with them. After one and a half years of life, a lot should already be done, and if it is not, it means that a lot went wrong at the very critical moment. Maybe you felt compelled to do something (to forgive or just some drastic reaction?) Maybe you didn't do what you wanted then? Maybe you still haven't shouted your anger or set the conditions of return? These are all question marks. Ideally, you should discuss it thoroughly with some good psychologist who would help you go through the whole process again - this time solving the problems for good. It is possible. Betrayal doesn't have to be a lifelong trauma.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Tatiana Ostaszewska-MosakHe is a clinical he alth psychologist.
Graduated from the Faculty of Psychology at the University of Warsaw.
She has always been particularly interested in the issue of stress and its impact on human functioning.
MyShe uses her knowledge and experience at psycholog.com.pl and at the Fertimedica Fertility Center.
Completed a course in integrative medicine with the world-famous professor Emma Gonikman.
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