My husband has a problem with alcohol, it's not a very serious problem yet, but I can see it is. He will definitely not come for treatment! What should I do? I feel helpless, I've talked to him a couple of times already, has he even admitted that he can't refuse alcohol? I am asking for advice, because he is counting on my help and I don't know how to help him.

Your husband has a problem with alcohol, but unfortunately you already have a problem with your husband's drinking. Paradoxical as it may sound, it would probably be best if you managed to remain helpless in this matter. If you look after your husband, reward him for his drinking and punish him for drinking, the husband will no longer take full responsibility for his problem. When he or she drinks too much or too often, the belief may be that it is because, for example, he or she has not been cared for enough. What you can do is, without judging whether your drinking is good or bad, talk to him about it. It is worth finding out what prevents him from refusing, what he finds attractive in drinking, what it means to him to be sober and drunk, whether drinking makes him easier or difficult for him. There may also be other questions. It is also worth asking yourself why your husband's drinking is painful for you.

Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.

Józef Sawicki

A specialist in individual therapies with many years of psychotherapeutic experience. In clinical work, she deals with psychotic patients. He is interested in the philosophy of the East. More at www.firma-jaz.pl.

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