I've been with my boyfriend for 1.5 years. We've been living together for 6 months, and for about 3 months I have absolutely no desire to have sex with him. In the past, I could make love a few times a day, and now he does not give me any pleasure when he touches me and caresses me, I even avoid kissing me. We had a lot of arguing a while ago, to the point where I started thinking about breaking up because of his behavior. Before, I looked at him as my future husband, and now I don't know what to think. I told him about it, he was really upset, he says that he will do anything for me to make me happy with him. He shows me tenderness, he tries his best and I can see it, only that I do not find his affection satisfied. I don't know what to do to keep it as it used to be.
The reason for not wanting sex and caressing is probably due to your earlier misunderstandings. Since you are wondering if this relationship makes sense, your quarrels must have been serious and had a strong impact on you. Usually, not wanting to have sex in this situation is just a symptom of something more serious that is going on between you and I think that to save the relationship, you should start by resolving any misunderstandings. If there are any unexplained, but only "sticky" topics among you and seem to be forgotten, explain them all. Discuss them calmly without accusing each other. Just talk about your feelings and fears. If some behavior of your partner causes you anger, regret, resentment, you need to explain it all and explain it all. After that, the atmosphere should clear up, and then the sex drive should come back.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Magdalena Krzak (Bogdaniuk)
Psychologist, psychotherapist, clinical sexologist and forensic sexologist. He has a Clinical Sexologist Certificate, awarded by the Polish Society of Sexology, after completing full specialization in clinical sexology in Warsaw, and a Court Sexologist Certificate. He deals with the treatment of sexual disorders in women and men. He works both individually and with couples. She conducts psychotherapy for victims of sexual violence. He conducts diagnostics and psychological support for transsexual people.
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