I am 30 years old, I have not been in any relationship with a man for 8 years. It seems to me that I avoid men, I have some kind of fear in front of them - it's hard for me to define it. Recently, I read a lot about adult children of divorce - my parents divorced when I was 5 years old. From around the age of 12 I had no contact with my father. His new wife made him a condition - either she or us. It always seemed to me that I was reconciled with it, but maybe now I transfer my sorrow to other men? That's why it's so hard to make contact with them?
Hello! It is possible that it is so, but there is no 100% certainty. I don't know exactly what could have influenced you like that and whether it is actually connected with your father leaving the family. Such issues are learned, analyzed and solved during therapy. It is definitely worth taking a look at the rules governing your relationships, maybe you are scared, maybe you use some style of thinking and behavior that prevents you from building a strong relationship. But why this is so, I cannot say. Many women who grew up without fathers have he althy and strong families, they are wives and mothers, and they do not mind shifting the responsibility for their failures onto a single upbringing. It is more a question of judging what happened than of the event itself. I advise you to check it carefully with a specialist in the office.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Tatiana Ostaszewska-MosakHe is a clinical he alth psychologist.
Graduated from the Faculty of Psychology at the University of Warsaw.
She has always been particularly interested in the issue of stress and its impact on human functioning.
She uses her knowledge and experience at psycholog.com.pl and at the Fertimedica Fertility Center.
She completed a course in integrative medicine with the world-famous professor Emma Gonikman.
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