Communicating with your teenager is not always a simple task. It happens that children in adolescence go through a time of rebellion and do not listen to adults, especially the elderly. So how do you reach your teen grandsons?

Communicating with a teenager is quite a challenge. It happens that a grandson is stubborn, closed in on himself, nothing of what is said to him reaches him. Why? There may be many reasons for this. Here are some tips and examples of clear communication.

How to reach a teenager? Communication problem

There is a lot behind the phrase "grandson is stubborn". You can imagine either a two-year-old child hiding behind an armchair and pooping in panties, or an eight-year-old tossing a notebook and saying, “I'm not doing these stupid lessons. No, because no, "or a teenager who tells her parents that she will go camping with her boyfriend, and they have nothing to say. Finally, you can imagine a sulky child who just purses his lips and says nothing. There can be many reactions, and they depend primarily on the age and character of the child. So how do you get to it?

How to reach a teenager? Reasons for misunderstandings

The main rule of good communication is to listen carefully to the other party to understand what they mean. The problem arises when little attention is paid to how the other party receives our messages.

In most cases, impaired communication can be considered one of the significant problems in reaching a teenager. Failure to precisely define his thoughts and expectations towards his grandson may result in him not knowing what the grandparents really mean and, as a result, he is silent, withdrawn or opposed.

How to reach a teenager? Rules for clear communication

  • First, think about the other person's behavior (or situation) that is in dispute. Check that the other party understands the situation as you do. For example: "Granddaughter, you were supposed to clean your room today, right?"
  • Second, describe how you react to what the other party is doing by talking about your reactions (message like "me") rather than judging the other party (message like "you"). For example: "I am angry that we arranged the cleaning for today, and you have broken our contract", instead of: "You are a lazy (you)and you cannot be relied upon. "
  • Third, tell me what kind of change you expect. Ask the other party if he or she agrees to pursue this change and agree on how it should be done. It is ideal if this plan is implemented together (eg "Tomorrow I will remind you to clean up and you will clean up, ok?"). If, despite such measures, there is still no change, then we sit down and discuss why the arrangements did not come into force and what prevents it, and what to do to make the obstacles disappear. Sometimes such treatments have to be repeated several times.

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