I have problems with making decisions both in trivial matters, e.g. buying shoes, and in more serious matters (where to live, work). I don't know where it comes from and how to help myself. Maybe I'm too demanding and I want the perfect solution? I also consider the opinions of others very much, which makes me even more hesitant. I envy people who know what they want and do not regret the previously made decision.
Hello! It is probably the case that you want the perfect solutions and you cannot come to terms with the fact that every decision has its advantages and disadvantages. Each decision has consequences that you will have to deal with for a long time or a long time (a place to live). You have to accept this fact - there are no perfect results! No matter how long you thought and don't know how many factors you took into account, it will never be perfect. It can only be good enough. It is worth considering, it is worth being prudent, but it is not worth demanding the impossible, because it only makes life difficult. It is worth making any decision other than doing nothing and hanging out. A decision will be made anyway (no decision is also a decision!), But it is worth doing it consciously, and not succumbing to the current of events and then regret it.
However, when you decide to do something, fight to be satisfied with what you have decided. See the positive sides of a choice, focus on the brighter sides of it, skip or "work out" the flaws. And don't blame yourself for making the wrong choice. Often, it is only in retrospect and the inflow of other information that we can assess what our decision was. We are then blamed that "I could have foreseen it!" Unfortunately, we often cannot, but must act and live. The problem is probably also that you don't know yourself and your needs very much. Focus on changing it for the next time - ask yourself what you want, what you prefer, what you like. Believe in yourself and your choices and don't try to be perfect! This will help you.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Tatiana Ostaszewska-MosakHe is a clinical he alth psychologist.
Graduated from the Faculty of Psychology at the University of Warsaw.
She has always been particularly interested in the issue of stress and its impact onhuman functioning.
She uses her knowledge and experience at psycholog.com.pl and at the Fertimedica Fertility Center.
She completed a course in integrative medicine with the world-famous professor Emma Gonikman.
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