I have been in a relationship with a man I care about for 3 years. Unfortunately, the more I am with him, the more I need him. I can't plan my day if I know I won't see it on that day. I can't rest, because I immediately think that he needs something more than me, that he would rather spend my time on his hobbies. Now he wants to study away from me. We will only see each other at the weekend, and in the previous years we used to see each other every day, because we live 200 meters from each other. This separation is going to kill me! How to explain to yourself that someone would rather hurt their loved ones than give up studying in another city? After all, he can study where I am, in the field he wants! Maybe it all has to do with the fact that when I was 7 my dad committed suicide…. I can't cope…. Or maybe love is not meant for me?….
Maybe …, maybe … But your love is written, because you can see - it is! But not only her, there is also fear (and not paranoia) that does not lead to anything good, the Lady herself can see. Nothing will calm him down for good, even if the loved one is with you all the time - then anxiety may creep in: what will happen next? Will it not go away? Won't my possessive behavior discourage him? If you love each other, the separation can be survived. It can be a good test whether you can live normally with each other, in partnership, without being enslaved, and trusting in yourself. I answer as my intuition dictates, because it is not a psychiatric problem. If it's psychological - and you could go to a psychologist with him, maybe you could use psychotherapy?
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Tomasz JaroszewskiSecond degree psychiatrist
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