BDSM is a type of sex that is based on a domination-submission relationship. The repertoire of BDSM techniques includes, among others beating, restraining, gagging, humiliating. This type of sex has become very popular in recent years, mainly due to books and films dealing with this subject. Even so, BDSM sex is still controversial and perceived as strange, perverse or immoral.

NameBDSMcomes from four English words:bondage ,discipline , dominationandsubbission , which in turn mean:binding ,discipline ,dominationandsubmission . During such sex, coercion is often used against the other person, butBDSM sexis not considered rape.

People who live together play certain roles: dominant ( top ) and submissive ( bottom ). Usually they are permanently assigned to partners, although with the consent of both parties they can change (which is also referred to in English as:switches ). Role swapping often occurs whenBDSM sexis chosen by people who did not know each other before and were induced to change through negotiations. They also often set a scenario for the entire act, which they then stick to strictly.

BDSM - basic elements

  • embarrassing- when one person has limited movements, a partner has a greater sense of power. It makes him feel more dominant and excited.
  • discipline- applies to a submissive person. Any non-compliance with the rules imposed by the "master" may result in a pen alty, e.g. in the form of flogging or spanking.
  • domination- dedicated to only one person during BDSM sex. This person decides about the development of the situation and what he will do and what orders his partner will carry out.
  • submission- is to characterize a partner who has consented to humiliation. The so-called the submissive are often corporally punished for any movements or gestures. They are also given orders, e.g. to pretend to be an animal.

Sadomasochizm and BDSM sex

Sadomasochism comes from two terms: "sado" and "masochism" and is directly related to the practices ofBDSM sex .

Sadism refers to feeling physically pleasurable while inflicting pain on anotherabout yourself. Masochism is about people who feel sexually aroused when they have to submit to someone during intercourse, when they are humiliated and sexually abused.

Sadomasochism can also mean damage suffered by one of the partners as a result of extreme play, e.g. after suffocation or too intense whipping. It is worth remembering that ill-considered games duringBDSM sexcan even lead to the death of your partner!

Worth knowing

Safety during BDSM sex

This form of love does not emphasize gentleness and comfort during intercourse. On the contrary, one of the partners is expected to feel pain and humiliation. Usually the person is tied or gagged with a belt or string. May be handcuffed or immobilized by a straitjacket.

InBDSM sexyou cross many lines to experience the full sexual freedom. The most important rule, however, is to be safe during intercourse. A special code was created for the protection of people who played the role of submissives.

SSC - an abbreviation from the English language specifying a set of rules that should be followed duringBDSM sex , i.e. sex should be "safe, with the consent of both parties and in your right mind ".

RACK - the code that regulates the rules that should be respected duringBDSM sex . Its main assumption is that everyone is responsible for their own well-being during intercourse. RACK aims to promote informed decisions and knowledge in this area.

Due to the fact thatBDSM sexhas its own set of rules, it is categorically distinguished from, for example, domestic violence or sexual abuse. People who have intercourse are aware that during intercourse, their partner may hurt them. The most important thing is for them to decide in advance to what limits they can go as far as possible. Additionally, they must enter a security password, i.e. a word or gesture after which the partner ends the relationship.

Gadgets used during BDSM sex

  • whips - a suitable prop for punishing. It is best if it is made of genuine leather. You can use it to hit the chest area without worrying about cutting the skin.
  • whips - they cause great pain, therefore they are recommended for people who are advanced inBDSM sex . This prop can be used to deal blows on the body, excluding the head. Due to the massiveness of the prop, it is recommended to use it, punishing the buttocks of a submissive person.
  • harnesses - the dominant person can fasten this prop on the submissive, e.g. when he wants her to play the role of an animal, e.g.horse
  • masks - put on the face so that the other person cannot see the facial expressions and domino expressions, making them more uncertain about their partner's feelings.
  • latex - the constituent material of costumes worn during sex. In bed games you can change your clothes to make your close-ups even more varied.
  • thigh belts - after putting on and properly positioning the submissive, they can be used as an aid that prevents, for example, joining or disconnecting the thighs. The legs will then be in the position that the dominant person wants.
  • leashes and collars - put on a submissive person when he or she is to play the role of an obedient dog.
  • shawls - one of the elements of disguise that can be introduced duringBDSM sex .
  • enemas - duringBDSM sexyou can make a submissive person empty himself / herself by using an enema.
  • buckles and clips - can be clipped on the skin in any place. It is preferable to put them on the nipples.
  • creping belts, gags, lines, handcuffs - these are ideal elements restricting movement or completely preventing the change of submissive position.

BDSM for beginners, or how to start?

If you are in a long-term relationship and a routine has entered your erotic life, and you want to change it, you do not have to start with methods that will scare your partner or partner. You don't have to go all out to introduce innovations during sex that will diversify your erotic life. Start with small and safe toys and if the two of you find that they have brought the expected results - keep trying. There is a reason why both the book series and the movie "Fifty Shades of Gray" became a bestseller.

Bindings - you can tie your mate or partner to the bed to restrict the submissive's movements. At the beginning, for this purpose, use a tie instead of handcuffs and ropes, so that the other person is aware that at any moment, with a stronger tug, he may release himself.

Whipping or flogging are the most popular games inBDSM , but they are definitely not recommended for starters. You need to prepare the other person well to feel any pain during sex. The level of pain that occurs when using additional items such as latex props may turn out to be too intense. To begin with, introduce traditional spanking as a form of punishment for disobedience. You can freely regulate their strength and check how the submissive / submissive reacts to them.

Covering your eyes - duringBDSM sexit's also about one personcompletely does not affect the course of events (scenario) of intercourse. You don't need to start this adventure by inflicting pain and violence if you find that you are not enjoying it. However, you can tie your partner to the bed, additionally covering her eyes or the whole face. The very fact of helplessness and ignorance, which may happen next, can very strongly stimulate the submissive, but also the dominant person by having total power over the other person.

Worth knowing

BDSM sex - is it legal?

In Poland, disseminating content that promotes sexual violence is punishable by imprisonment from two to twelve years. On the other hand, practicingBDSM sex , which is a form of sexual intercourse (with the consent of two people who live with each other), is not subject to any legal sanctions. However, there are countries where this is not the case. An example is the United Kingdom, where such acts are illegal. Their practice is punishable. Opponents of this law argue that intercourse takes place between adult people, who should be free to make decisions about their own body. Despite everything, British law does not allow you to inflict physical pain on another person, even with their consent.

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Art of love