We often think that sex is a sphere of life that ceases to count with age. Nothing could be more wrong. There is no such thing as erotic retirement, because we are a woman and a man to the very end. In addition, sex in old age improves he alth. However, mature sex may be hindered by problems related to menopause, andropause and diseases.
Intercourseafter fifty or sixty looks different than in youth. It becomes less intense aslibidois usually lower and age-related limitations arise. But the very fact that this sphere of sensations still interests us is a very good sign of our he alth and mental condition. Sexual life depends on temperament, hormone play and individual predispositions. Actually, there are no rules: some men in their fifties have a decline in excitability almost imperceptible, while others have a sharp decline. It is mainly influenced by the hormonal economy. The male body produces testosterone throughout life, although production of this hormone declines after the age of 30 - a 60-70-year-old man usually has half as much testosterone as in his youth. But it's not uncommon for older men to have more of the male hormone than young boys, and menopause usually becomes the turning point in women's intimacy. Many ladies, unfortunately, stop havingsexthen. Characteristically, the most sexual activity is maintained by those women who have opted for hormone replacement therapy.
Why do women stop having sex after menopause?
Why do some of the women who stop having periods lose their desire for sex and consider their sex life a closed chapter? "The reasons for this are complex," says the drug. med. Beata Anna Ciesielska, sexologist dealing with these problems on a daily basis. - Often it is simply neglect, e.g. untreated or improperly treated menopause, progressive atrophic changes in the reproductive organs and the associated unpleasant feelings that discourage intercourse. Meanwhile, it is worth remembering that it is regular intercourse that allows you to go through the difficult time after menopause more gently and to enter your old age with joy. A common cause of declining interest in sex isdepression. We should remember that women struggle with loneliness more often than men - as widows, divorced women, but also when they cannot find each other in their relationship. Experts say that the key to a successful intimate relationship between women is usually in the psyche, and the best aphrodisiac is life satisfaction. Women who have undergone serious gynecological procedures experience a strong fear of having sexual intercourse. They are afraid that after breast surgery or hysterectomy, they are no longer attractive to their partner, that they are no longer real, full women for them. In fact, it is just a matter of the psyche - none of these treatments limit the ability to perceive erotic stimuli or reduce libido. After all, the pleasure center is located in the brain, and intercourse can be started a few weeks after the procedure. Lack of interest in sex is also the first sign of developing diabetes - then nothing will happen without the help of a doctor.
Find out how to increase libido
Male problems with sex after andropause
The majority of elderly people who consult a sexologist are men. While they do not lack sexual appetite, their potency sometimes fails. The most common cause of ED are serious medical conditions - not yet diagnosed, untreated or treated poorly. Among them, the first place is occupied by vascular diseases: atherosclerosis and hypertension. The blood vessels in the penis are very delicate, so it's no wonder that they are the first to undergo degenerative changes. During an erection, the blood flow through the penis increases over 200 times. So if the arteries don't dilate, they can't take in that amount of blood. In order to find the root cause of the disorders, the sexologist conducts a thorough medical interview. It happens that he is the first to recognize a patient with diabetes. For a proper erection and maintaining an erection, the interaction of the nervous and endocrine systems is also necessary. The first sign of nervous diseases is anesthetic ejaculation (i.e. without feeling). Very dangerous is severe stress and untreated depression, which destroy testosterone. A sharp drop in the level of this hormone makes the patient's overall functioning worse. He has a depressed mood, becomes sleepy, loses interest in matters that have previously occupied him. In this case, you can use hormonal supplementation - permanent or temporary - always under the control of an endocrinologist. A natural method of stopping the loss of testosterone is to maintain physical fitness and have regular sex. This allows the testicles to get used to producing more of it. And as research confirms - this hormone affects all spheres of life: the willingness towork, cheerfulness and interest in the world, mental fitness. Gentlemen who have problems with potency know very well that it is best to make love in the morning. Then the testosterone level is the highest during the day.
Question to an expertKatarzyna Klimko-Damska, Sexologist, Professional Assistance Center in Warsaw www.cpp.net.pl- Am I too old to shop in a sex shop? After 25 years of marriage, our sex is just boring. I dream of adding some "pepper" to him, buying a vibrator, but I think I'm too old for shopping in a sex shop …
Sex can be boring not only after 25 years of marriage, but after a year if partners do not care about its quality. Sex in a long-term relationship is more predictable, harder to surprise, but doesn't have to be boring! If we reach for culinary comparisons, if we like to eat something, we try to eat it often and we are not bored at all. We add flavor to the dish with spices. It's the same with sex.
In your idea of flavoring your close-ups, a vibrator is supposed to act as a spice, and that's great! The problem is that you have an idea for a spice, but you don't have the courage to do it. I'm not sure what you mean by "I guess I'm too old …"? Too old to buy a vibrator? Too old to have sex? Too old to make my sex enjoyable and satisfying? Do you really feel too old? Does this echo the stereotype that it does not fall out at a certain age? Where, apart from our heads and stereotypes, is the age for which we are too old for sex?
Until you get rid of this misconception - "I'm too old", it will be difficult to "season" your bed dish. Just like in the kitchen, fantasy is essential in bed, but also courage to experiment. It's fantastic that sex is important to you and that you want to change something in this area. For me, it is proof that you are a mature woman, aware of your needs, and not an old woman!
I wonder why you would go to a sex shop by yourself? Without your partner's involvement in "seasoning", it will be difficult to make a difference. Just talking and planning a trip to a sex shop can be very exciting. Thanks to a good, open conversation with a great sense of humor, you can discover that despite 25 years of being together and the belief that "you read like a book", only now you will get to know your fantasies.
25 years of a relationship can be a great foundation for building a unique relationship and special sex. Please remember that a vibrator is just a gadget that can add variety, but without drawing on your fantasy resources, it will only bevibrating oblong object
Successful sex in old age - important overall he alth
It should also be remembered that an erection can be weakened by medications taken by a man. They include, among others cardiac agents, used in anti-ulcer treatment, antidepressants, sedatives and hypnotics. Some over-the-counter medications also have this effect. - I often conduct educational talks with my patients - says Beata Ciesielska. - I explain that he alth determines the quality of sexual life. Only after such “realization” do the gentlemen acknowledge that hypertension needs to be treated continuously and continuously. Usually, they do not pay attention to it and take medication only when they suffer from high blood pressure. It also happens that it is the sexologist who convinces about the need to see a urologist for a checkup.
Consequences of sexual abstinence
The longer the break in your sex life, the more difficult it is to come back. Many women who have a break in sexual activity for a year or more experience this. Then, persistent inflammation of the genital and urinary tract appears, and the difficult-to-treat bacterial and fungal infections reappear. This is the so-called Kerher syndrome. It turns out that after starting regular intercourse, these problems pass, as he took away with his hand. But sometimes there are problems when you start having sex again. The so-called Widow's syndrome is manifested by pain during (or after) intercourse, weakened vaginal nerve endings or, conversely, vaginal hypersensitivity, lack of orgasm. It is the result of atrophic, hormonal and neurogenic changes and, of course, a mental attitude which is often dominated by fear, whether conscious or not. Then, long foreplay and the use of vaginal lubricants are particularly important.
Debunking myths about older sex
Sometimes men with a sick heart or after a heart attack avoid sex because they are afraid of "la mort douce", or "sweet death" during the act of love. However, it happens very rarely and is usually the result of the "delegation syndrome" - when you, somewhere away, want to prove your masculinity to your partner, after a heavy and drunk meal. Sexual intercourse alone is not a great effort for the heart. It can be compared with a fairly quick walk. Cardiologists believe that a patient after a heart attack may begin sexual activity after a month. To feel safe, he may be a less active party during intercourse. It is commonly believed that surgery on the prostate gland means the end of a man's intimate life. Therefore, men with a diseased prostate feel as if the earth is slipping away from under their feet. Nothing like thatwonder. Traditional Eastern medicine recognizes the prostate gland as the base chakra, i.e. the source of vitality for the whole organism. However, it is not true that prostate removal deprives you of masculinity. Gentlemen do not lose the ability to erect and have intercourse. The only difference is that you don't ejaculate (because it's the prostate that produces most of the seminal fluid).
ImportantReport on the sexuality of Poles 2002 painfully exposes our ignorance about the intimate sphere of life of elderly people. Most of our compatriots believe that people in their sixties are incapable of having sexual contact. Meanwhile, 41 percent. retirees admit to active sex life, and 15 percent. he would like to run them, but he has no partner. According to the latest research, every fourth man over 70 is sexually fit!
Mature sex - important closeness
Beata Ciesielska emphasizes that the basis of a successful intimate life in the fall of life is the systematic treatment of existing diseases. As an aid, it is worth taking a good vitamin and mineral preparation, for example enriched with ginseng root extract. A he althy lifestyle, a varied diet, taking care of physical fitness, an optimistic view of the world - all this helps to enjoy life. But there comes a time when the body's capabilities naturally diminish. Getting together just becomes too strenuous physical exertion. It is then that the mutual closeness of partners becomes of special value. When we meet such an elderly couple in the park - she and he are gray as doves, holding hands, smiling - we have no doubt that they have good times behind them. Many years have to be lived together and many transitions to create such a harmonious pair at the end. A long and successful sex life is one of the spheres that cement the relationship best.
When examining relationships with many years of experience, which despite their gray temples have a successful erotic life, it was found that these couples:
- They look at each other as if time has stopped; they see the partner as he was at the beginning of the relationship.
- They take care of their appearance, also their clothes at home.
- They react strongly to specific stimuli, e.g. perfumes that the other half have been using for years.
Mature sex: potency drugs
Only a specialist can order a drug to improve potency. It cannot be treated as an aphrodisiac - when taken on its own, without medical consultation, it does more harm than good. The drug must be selected depending on the he alth condition and other medications taken by the patient. Contraindication to taking these agents is severe liver failure,severe hypotension (less than 90/50), high hypertension (greater than 170/110), previous stroke, hereditary degenerative changes of the retina.
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