I am 25 years old and have quite a serious problem that I would like to be able to solve, but I can't find a way … Well, I've been in a relationship for a year. I believe that I am happy in it and my other half feels it too. The problem is, I've had a crush on someone else recently and can't get them out of my head. I don't want to end my relationship, I just want this crush to pass me by. I feel like I'm cheating on my other half and I feel very sorry for myself about it. Is this normal in relationships? How can I deal with it and is there any way to do it? Or maybe this is something wrong with me and I am not suitable for a permanent relationship?
You describe a quite common situation that happens to your peers - but not only. Our reason has little influence on our emotions, and perhaps nature had a purpose here. Perhaps the point was that we could create the best possible relationship for procreation, which - on a global scale - serves to extend the species. In your situation, it's worth not to panic, because nothing terrible has happened yet. The most important thing is to be fair to your partner and not get caught up in two parallel relationships. Give yourself a few days to cool down or to reflect on which one is more important to you.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Bohdan BielskiPsychologist, specialist with 30 years of experience, trainer of psychosocial skills, expert psychologist of the District Court in Warsaw.
Main areas of activity:mediation services, family counseling, care for a person in a crisis situation, manager training.
First of all, it focuses on building good relationships based on understanding and respect. He undertook numerous crisis interventions and took care of people in a deep crisis.
He lectured in forensic psychology at the Faculty of Psychology of SWPS in Warsaw, at the University of Warsaw and the University of Zielona Góra.
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