Our son has always been a very good student. He got into the best high school in town. He has not been studying at all for several months. He will have two doubles and three threes for six months. He spends time after school with his friends, playing football or on the ice rink. At home, he takes care of everything except lessons. He accepts attempts to persuade him to learn as an attempt on his own freedom. When we do not give him money to enter the ice rink - he borrows from his friends. After all, we've got to get him to give back. We talked to the parents of one of the friends. The other one studies a little and has better grades. We're worried about the son. We both have higher education and we don't want to have a child. The teachers say that we are unnecessarily nervous because the son is gifted and will do well. Apparently, he believes in lessons, and has bad grades for the lack of homework. They try to interest him in physics and art. They advise you to wait it out. Should we trust them and stop worrying?
Dear! It seems that your son is in the hands of good, wise educators. It is rare for a school to give parents this advice. You have met with experienced teachers who know about young people, look closely at them and apply gentle tactics to them. They do not condemn your son for insubordination, but try to understand him and believe in his abilities. Probably your son is not the first such case in their professional career. They know that there are gifted students with a good memory, whose attention and participation in the lesson are sufficient to master the required knowledge. They acknowledge that life is not only about learning, and that the young person develops not only in the school desk. They perceive students' interests and try to help develop them. They try to respect the individual needs of the student and if, in their opinion, the situation does not lead to a catastrophe, they reassure their parents by advising (for example you) to wait. It is rare for people characterized by cognitive curiosity (and this is probably what your son is like) that the intellectual activity drops from Monday to Tuesday to zero. The teachers seem to be in control of the situation. Trust them. They are already trying to involve the boy in areas that they think can activate him. Apart from traditional learning, there are a number of other ways to create conditions for students to develop and acquire knowledge. With good knowledgethe student knows what methods to use. Therefore, do not be surprised if in a few weeks it turns out, for example, that your son spends his time in a physical lab, where he prepares a lesson for the next day together with the teacher and enthusiasts of the subject, and then conducts the lesson himself. There can be many such surprises. And may they happen. You must, of course, keep an eye on how the situation unfolds and not let him rest while spending his time only in mind-boggling activities, the wide variety of which is offered by modern reality. I wish you successful cooperation with the school, imminent breakthrough and getting rid of anxiety. B.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Barbara Śreniowska-SzafranEducator with many years of experience.
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