I'm lonely by choice. At least most of my friends think so. But from my point of view it is not exactly like that. When a man starts to interest me, it is good, but as soon as he starts to reciprocate my feelings, I start to distance myself from him. I push him away, despite the fact that some time ago this is what I wanted - for him to come closer to me. Every relationship I have ends before it really starts and, worst of all, it does every time. I can't answer the question of what I'm running from.
Are you sure that you are running away from something? Maybe it is more about choosing something that makes you feel better, which is more exciting? I do not know if it will matter to you, but in your letter, what attracted my attention was the fact that you used the word "to begin" four times. As if it was particularly attractive for you to undertake some new activities (maybe not only in relations with men). What's more, it seems that you would like to start, have the initiative. I advise you to check how you feel in the undertakings that someone is starting and managing. If it is difficult, then maybe it is worth starting to learn it. It will definitely not lose the valuable ability to start, take initiative.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Józef SawickiA specialist in individual therapies with many years of psychotherapeutic experience. In clinical work, she deals with psychotic patients. He is interested in the philosophy of the East. More at www.firma-jaz.pl.
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