I'm 25 years old. When I was 10-11 years old, when I started growing up, I was molested by my dad's friend. We watched TV in the room, Dad went somewhere, we were left alone. He put his huge hands under my blouse, squeezing my already growing breasts and asked if I liked it. I started to pull away but he squeezed tighter and started to say ugly things. He reached up to my crotch. I broke away. He started to laugh - I can still hear his mocking voice and mocking laughter. I said I would tell my dad everything, and he said that my father wouldn't believe me, that he would laugh like he did now. I ran away, I tried to forget it, but I can't, I can't. He used to visit my dad, but I tried to avoid him. Once I came across him while he was in the room and I came out of the bathroom, he said to me "you got a pussy". Over the years, there have been unpleasant, traumatic situations in my life that, in my opinion, were a consequence of this harassment - because it was harassment, wasn't it? I surrounded myself with an impenetrable barrier for other people, especially men. I am asking for help, where to go for advice, where and how to heal (I cannot afford private treatment), how to live?
Hello
What you describe was undoubtedly sexual harassment. Women with a problem similar to yours feel the effects of harassment for many years, including into adulthood. Often it is a lack of trust in people, especially in men, aversion to men, various sexual problems (aversion, lack of desire for sex, lack of pleasure). The topic of molestation is very embarrassing, women think that they are different, worse, that it is their fault, which is why they separate themselves from the rest of the people with a wall. The way to get out of it is to open up to help from the outside, break through and tell about it, along with speaking, you will throw away a huge emotional load accumulated over the years. In your case, psychotherapy for victims of sexual violence is also recommended. This therapy is very effective and will allow you to enjoy your life again. There are many state centers dealing with this type of problem. Please look for help centers for sexually abused women or women who have experienced help on the Internet and contact them, or call the helpline - they will certainly indicate a help center appropriate for your place of residence.
Regards
Magdalena Bogdaniuk
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Magdalena Krzak (Bogdaniuk)
Psychologist, psychotherapist, clinical sexologist and forensic sexologist. He has a Clinical Sexologist Certificate, awarded by the Polish Society of Sexology, after completing full specialization in clinical sexology in Warsaw, and a Court Sexologist Certificate. He deals with the treatment of sexual disorders in women and men. He works both individually and with couples. She conducts psychotherapy for victims of sexual violence. He conducts diagnostics and psychological support for transsexual people.
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