Hello, I have a problem, I am 19 years old and I have sex with a man with whom I have been in a relationship for a year. Unfortunately, he doesn't orgasm, I don't want to lie to my partner, but I'm afraid that I will hurt him because he thinks it's because of him, that he can't get me to climax. I would like to know what the causes of my problem could be and if I can do something about it. I would like to finally take full advantage of the relationship with my man.
Men can achieve orgasm from the beginning of their sex life, women need to learn it. First of all, the technique of stimulation is important and your awareness of what kind of stimulation gives you pleasure and what not, because each woman experiences it differently. Most women do not experience an orgasm when stimulating the vagina, only when stimulating the clitoris. Being aware of this makes it possible to choose such positions during intercourse that provide stimulation of the clitoris, for example the classic position in which the man lies on top of the woman, or the rider position, in which the lady herself can decide on the intensity and type of stimulation. another solution is to stimulate the clitoris with a finger during intercourse. You can do it yourself or ask your partner. To get to know your body better, you can try to stimulate the genitals yourself to find out which touch is most pleasing to you. It is also very important to talk honestly with your partner and explain to him that your satisfaction is harder and you need more time and effort. How can your boyfriend be able to bring you to climax if you do not tell him that there is no climax or what caresses you need to make it happen? After all, he is not a miracle worker. Talking about your sexual needs and telling your partner what's nice in bed for you should be a fundamental part of any relationship. Otherwise, it may come to the point that one of the parties does not feel satisfaction and the other party will finally start to guess that something is wrong and only then may blame the partner for hiding it from him.
Remember that our expert's answer is informative and will not replace a visit to the doctor.
Magdalena Krzak (Bogdaniuk)
Psychologist, psychotherapist, clinical sexologist and forensic sexologist. She has a Sexologist CertificateClinical, awarded by the Polish Society of Sexology, after completing full specialization in clinical sexology in Warsaw and the Certificate of a Forensic Sexologist. He deals with the treatment of sexual disorders in women and men. He works both individually and with couples. She conducts psychotherapy for victims of sexual violence. He conducts diagnostics and psychological support for transsexual people.
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